It seems there is a rumour going around that my beloved earns a lot of money. I assure you that this is ,sadly, not the case. She is the victim of mistaken identity.
Recent press reports that "Hester earns £1.2m annually" may well have some foundation, but it does not refer to my dear partner. Someone, who works for the Royal Bank of Scotland, is scooping this money. I don't know who she is, but I will be having a few stiff words when I track her down.
We have had a lot of begging letters, and I do feel for some of the writers.
Miss Childs of Essex, is particularly close to my heart. I am sure you are an elderly lady in similar circumstances to myself. I am most touched by your request for money to spend on your pussy. No doubt you live alone, and wish to spend some money on pampering. I am however, concerned that you wish to have it shaved and covered in diamonds. Is this really the best way to treat your cat? Our local vet certainly doesn't offer this service.
Hope I have cleared up any misunderstandings.