Friday, 12 October 2007

Monkey Business (Revised)

I was recently reading the blog of LK, a thing I am wont to do, and was interested to note that she says some people do not write their own blogs. It got me to thinking about the whole spectre of ghostwriting. "Spectre of ghostwriting", I sometimes almost impress myself with my wit, because I have a habit of understatement. You lot must be gobsmacked by it. Anyway,it seems us bloggers are not always what we purport to be. There is so much trickery in the world and it would appear it has permeated the blogosphere. Her post has prompted me to hold up my hand and to say I am not what I seem. I have a dark secret and my honest nature impels me to come clean with you all. I DO NOT WRITE MY OWN BLOG. Should you be in possession of a working crucifix this would be a good time to press it against the screen and pray fervently for my soul. I feel ashamed, but it is the truth. My posts are put together by a group of monkeys with typewriters. Could explain a lot, I hear people say. They (the monkeys) recently, and successfully, finished their attempt at duplicating the complete works of Shakespeare. OK, it took over 350 years and the use of a time machine and some dodgy stem cell research, but I think it was worth it. They were at a loose end when I first met them but after I had given them the remit for writing my blog they seemed very enthusiastic. Although they write the blog I still have editorial control. I have to "fine tune" some of their work, or "totally rewrite the crap they produce" as others say, but it is fun. The pleasure I see on their white hairy faces when they submit a blog post is priceless. For everything else there is that naff credit card that keeps getting advertised on the TV. Have to go now because I need to nip down to the local store for some bananas. I seem to be buying a lot of them lately!

17 comments:

cheeky minx said...

The reference to the credit card ads when seeing the faces of your blog writing monkeys was priceless.

Martyne said...

Welcome aboard cheeky minx, I likes the cut of your jib young lady. At least I am assuming you are a lady. Gender can be a moveable feast in the blogosphere! I have "fine tuned" the post and I hope you like the result. Is it just me, or is there a seafaring flavour permeating my recent work?

cheeky minx said...

You are correct in the assumption I am a lady, that was a litmus test of your intuition! The added info was noted.

Martyne said...

My intuition is usally right,cheeky minx, as a woman's tends to be. But what is the "added info" you speak of?

cheeky minx said...

Sometimes you aren't quite up there, you revised the entry of monkey business after I'd made my comment and added some info to it. I was declaring my amazing powers of observation in noting the changes most noticeably the bananas comment.

Martyne said...

I assume you liked the "bananas" comment, cheeky minx. It was an omission from the original post due to excess sherry consumption. My favourite aspect of this post is "working crucifix". That one just happened as I was revising. It can be taken on different levels depending on your viewpoint. I might be the mistress of flippant but I can do deep as well. Gosh, I'm so dynamic, and modest with it.

Laurie Kendrick said...

I like the new look.

Martyne said...

Thanks Laurie K. You know I value your opinion.

Laurie said...

I'm sure you figured out that I write my own blogs. I'm not full of wit and I dont have a creative bone in my body. I should prolly work on that.

damewiggy said...

too funny, woman.

consequently, i don't write my own blog either. my mother and youtube took over.

bastids.

Deacon Barry said...

Are the monkeys New world or Old world? And if they're using typewriters, how do they get the post onto the internet?

Deacon Barry said...

There's something fishy going on, that's for sure, and that's my sole reason for making this comment.

Old Knudsen said...

I don't write my own blog posts, no really I'm not accepting responsibility for that shite, it was the Devil.

Martyne said...

laurie;
I love you just the way you are. If you want to work on anything it should "prolly" be your spelling! I hope you are feeling well now and have resumed your running schedule. I will visit you soon to check up. All the best girl.
damewiggy;
What an honour to have a visit from you. If YouTube did loyalty points you would probably be set up for a round-the-world flight by now. Take care dear.
old knudsen;
You have been visited by the Devil. My blog seems to have been recently tainted by The Deep Blue Sea!
deacon;
I have not been able to muster any piscean reposts to your comments but I am working on it. There have got to be more fish in the sea.

cheeky minx said...

well Deacon if sole is your reason then this is the plaice to be

Martyne said...

Just going to mussel in here for a moment to answer deacon's questions. The monkeys are Olde Worlde, just like yours truly. I READ what has been TYPED by the monkeys on the PAPER. I EDIT it in my HEAD and then TYPE the result with my FINGERS into my COMPUTER. Comprehensive reply or what? I should add that my fingers are not made of fish. If they were I would have A) Extreme difficulty typing and B) have eaten them long ago. I just love those babies.

somebody said...

酒店經紀人,菲梵酒店經紀,酒店經紀,禮服酒店上班,酒店小姐,便服酒店經紀,酒店打工,酒店寒假打工,酒店經紀,酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工經紀,制服酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工,酒店經紀,制服酒店經紀,酒店經紀